Ultimate Wedding Planning Guide + Free Venue Checklist

An important adulting milestone for many of us in our 20s and 30s is the decision of whether or not to get married. For those of us who decide to get married and have a wedding, wedding planning can be a super daunting task. There are so many things to consider for our wedding day! The guest list, the wedding budget, who to include in our wedding party, and so much more! How do we keep track of it all when we already have other responsibilities that keep us busy? 

I’ve been very excited to write a series of posts on wedding planning because my little sister recently announced her engagement! True to my neurotic form, I immediately put together about 30 pages of planning templates and documents, including a wedding planning questionnaire to outline your vision, a wedding planner interview with the most important questions to ask when deciding on which professional wedding planner to hire, a venue comparison checklist, and so much more. If you’d like your own copy, you can check out my Ultimate Wedding Planning Printables Bundle.

While I can’t go into 30 pages of detail here, in this post I will go over the key things to keep in mind as you are starting your wedding planning process. I focus on the steps you need to take within the first couple of months of planning so that everything else hopefully falls into place much more easily. Plus, I include a free wedding venue checklist for new subscribers! I hope these tips help make your special day as stress-free as possible.

In upcoming posts, I’ll discuss how to reduce wedding costs, how to plan a micro wedding or elopement, and how to plan bridal showers and bachelorette parties if you’re a maid of honor or bridesmaid!

Your First Wedding Planning Step: Soak Up the Moment

As my sister told me after she got engaged, the most important thing is to soak up the moment. You may feel tempted to dive right into wedding planning tasks. However, this will hopefully be the only time you get engaged! Take a moment to appreciate this beautiful declaration of love. You might even hold an engagement party to celebrate the moment even more.

Your Second Wedding Planning Step: Create a Timeline

Among your first big decisions is to get a rough sense of your wedding date. The more of a head start you can give yourself, the less stressful the wedding planning process is likely to be. For example, on average, venues book 9-14 months in advance. You generally need to budget closer to 14 months for peak season dates and times. Likewise, photographers generally can book 12 months or more before a wedding. And wedding dresses tend to require multiple fittings. Wedding planners therefore recommend you give yourself 8-12 months to find and buy a wedding dress.

In my Wedding Planning Bundle, I offer 15-month, 1-year, and 9-month wedding planning checklists. Each detailed checklist goes over the key tasks you need to consider month by month when planning your wedding. 

If you take a look at these checklists, you’ll notice that there is a lot to do in the first couple of months if you have only 9 months until your intended wedding date. In contrast, a 15-month timeline gives you much more room to breathe.

For example, on a 9-month timeline, you’ll want to start touring venues right away. Consequently, it’s helpful if you do a little research before getting engaged to get a sense of your style and location preferences. In contrast, if you’re on a 15-month timeline, you can generally spend a month or more assessing your preferences before you really need to dive into touring venues.

Ultimately, you’re best equipped to make the right decision about your timeline and preferences. My sister is planning a wedding that’s roughly 9 months after her engagement. That’s the best decision for her and her fiancee and what they’re envisioning! However, it’s helpful to keep in mind the pros and cons of different timelines as you’re making decisions.

Establish a Wedding Budget

One of your other first steps is establishing your budget. This is a super hard decision. And the reality is that many couples end up going way over budget. However, ideally you want to avoid going into debt over your wedding. Way easier said than done, I know.

Evaluate how much money you currently have saved, how much money you could realistically save each month for the wedding, and whether you have any financial support from friends or family members. If you’re not engaged yet, establish your budget and start saving now! Giving yourself time to save for your wedding before you are engaged means you’ll be better equipped to have the wedding of your dreams.

Once you have a sense of your financial resources, evaluate whether that amount covers the wedding you would like to have. The average wedding in 2023 cost $29,000. And it’s $35,000 in some major cities! However, there’s considerable variation across locations, the number of guests, the time of year, and so much more. 

In my Wedding Planning Bundle I offer a budget worksheet that includes all of the key items to budget for, from your wedding dress to photographers to wedding invitations. As you weigh your budget, make sure you’re thinking about all of the key components you want in your wedding and be generous with your estimates. Many people are surprised at just how much everything to do with weddings costs. Plus, tips and fees are rarely included in published costs.

In an upcoming post, I’ll discuss creative ways to save money on your wedding.

Creating a Guest List

For many couples, the most stressful aspect of planning is deciding on the number of guests. It’s not an easy task to balance who you would like to invite, feel obligated to invite, and can afford to invite. Depending on your cultural background, you may also experience unique obligations to invite extended family, friends, religious figures, etc.

Ideally, you and your partner should start by discussing who is most important to include among your wedding guests. To put it a little crassly, this will be your Tier 1 group of wedding guests. Then discuss who you would like to include in your wedding if you have the resources to do so. This will be your Tier 2 group of wedding guests.

Next, assess whether you think your wedding budget can accommodate your Tier 2 guests, including any plus 1’s if you plan on offering that option. If not, revert to Tier 1. 

What to Do About Family Pressure

You’ll likely have at least one family member who pressures you to add what I’ll call Tier 3 wedding guests. These are the guests you barely know. Heck, maybe you haven’t even met them before! 

If you have the budget to accommodate a big group of people, you might consider inviting these family *ahem* randos. 

However, if adding more people is outside of your budget and certainly if it would put you in debt, I encourage you to tell that family member that you would love to invite their proposed guest, but you don’t have the budget to do so. If they would like to contribute to the wedding fund, you could expand the guest list.

Did that idea make your palms sweat a little? I understand that option may not be palatable or even feel culturally possible for everyone. However, it hopefully offers an option for setting realistic boundaries with family members. It can also keep you from going into debt over people that, let’s be honest, you don’t care about that much.

Build (or Get!) a Wedding Checklist

Once you have an estimate of your timeline and the number of guests you want, you can really delve into planning. Weddings come with a long list of to-dos. I’ve made it easier by creating a detailed wedding checklist to create the wedding of your dreams. As mentioned above, this wedding planner is available for 15-month, 1-year, and 9-month timelines. You can check off each item as you complete tasks to stay on track.

You can find this checklist on my Etsy store! Alternatively, you can create your own. Make sure to do some research to figure out how far in advance you need to book important vendors like photographers and caterers, when you should send out save the dates vs. invitations, etc. Compile this information in a checklist so you don’t have to stress about what you might be forgetting about.

Deciding on a Wedding Venue + Free Wedding Venue Checklist!

Okay, now that you hopefully have your checklist, a rough guest list, a rough timeline, and a budget, it’s time to explore wedding venues. Many important details fall into place once you decide on your wedding venue. For one thing, your choice of venue will likely dictate the specific date of your wedding, how much space you have, whether you get to pick a caterer or use an in-house caterer, and more.

However, it’s pretty daunting to find the perfect wedding venue. To make it easier, I’ve included a wedding venue checklist in the Ultimate Wedding Bundle. You can also get it for free by joining my subscriber list for this blog! I don’t spam you, you just get notifications when new posts are out! Okay, back to our regularly scheduled content….

I also love using Zola and the Knot to compare wedding venues. Doing an initial web search of venues in your area may help you clarify important questions like whether you want a primarily indoor or outdoor wedding, what kind of aesthetic you want, and whether you want a location that includes lots of services in their rental fee or whether you want something more simple.

Once you have a sense of what you like and don’t, try targeting your search more. For example, you might filter to locations that have outdoor space, gardens, or that are under a maximum price. As you’re searching, make note of the locations you like and the pros and cons you can glean from your first search. Copy pictures of the venue into a file so you can easily remember which venue is which. You might even create a wedding Pinterest board to help keep track of these details.

Venue Questions to Ask Yourself

Include a list of questions about the site if any come to you. Some essential questions to consider include:

• Will the venue accommodate your guest count?
• What length of time does your rental fee cover and will that be enough for your entire event?
• What are the rates for a peak season vs. off-season date and do those rates fit within your budget?
• Is the venue in your perfect location? Or will you have to account for extra travel costs to get there and/or stay near the venue?
• Do they have a separate area for the wedding ceremony vs. wedding reception if so desired?
• How does the venue work with the color palette you’re considering? For the most part, venues will tend to have pretty neutral décor, but keep this in mind if you feel strongly about colors and aesthetics.
• Do they have a bridal suite for the bridal party to stay and get ready? Or will you need to figure out transportation and nearby lodging for getting ready?
• Do they offer a wedding package with your preferred range of services? For example, some venues provide chairs, tables, linens, decorations, and more in their wedding packages.

Hopefully this initial assessment will help you narrow down your preferred venue list to a manageable handful. The next step is to reach out to the venue and schedule a visit.

Venue Questions to Ask on Your Site Visit

On your site visit, make sure you take pictures and plenty of notes. The free handy wedding venue checklist makes that way easier too!

Make sure to ask any unresolved questions you have. While you can answer a number of wedding venue questions from online resources, there are lots of logistical questions that you can usually only answer with a wedding venue tour. I’ve included a list of these additional questions to consider below:

• Have they held similar weddings to the type of wedding you’re planning? Can they provide examples?
• Can you bring an outside caterer and other wedding vendors if so desired? Or do they have a preferred vendor list or in-house caterer?
  • If you must use their caterer, does their caterer accommodate any necessary dietary restrictions?
• Is the venue available for your preferred range of dates?
• If you intend to use an outdoor area for the venue, is there a contingency plan if there’s inclement weather?
• Do they have an adequately sized dance floor and sound system available if you’re hoping to do a lot of dancing?
• Is there enough parking for your guests?
• Are there any accessibility issues that would be tricky for guests with disabilities?
• Are there any time or noise restrictions that may interfere with your wedding plans?
• Do they offer a coordinator for the day of the wedding? What about any other wedding coordination services?
• Does the rental rate include any additional fees or service charges you should know about like a cake-cutting fee or corkage fee?
• What is their cancellation policy?
• Does the venue require you to have liability insurance?
• Do they have any payment plans that might be useful to you?

Deciding on Your Perfect Venue

Of course, this list of questions isn’t exhaustive. However, I hope it helps you find the right venue for you. All venues have their pros and cons. And it’s hard to find the dream wedding venue you may be envisioning in your head. However, take extensive notes and pictures. You might even create a vision board or wedding Pinterest board! And give yourself plenty of time to compare your list of venues to help you make the right choice.

Final Thoughts on Early Wedding Planning Steps

These first steps will set you up well and make the rest of your wedding planning much easier. Early planning plays a significant role in lessening your stress later on. No one likes feeling rushed last minute or missing out on the perfect venue because of time. The good news is that there are tons of great resources to make all this planning easier.

Again, check out Zola or the Knot for tons of great sources. Subscribe to my blog to receive your free, comprehensive wedding checklist and to receive updates on more wedding guidance! And check out the Ultimate Wedding Planning Bundle to get a wedding venues checklist, wedding planning schedule, journal prompts, wedding budget template, and so much more. For a limited time only, you can name your price for this bundle!

I hope you have the most amazing time planning your own big day!

If you enjoyed this post, please consider liking, subscribing, or sharing with others. I really appreciate it! And if you’re interested in related content, check out my posts on managing family conflict, designing holiday cards for free or a low cost, and inexpensive, romantic date ideas.